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Shrimp 'n Grits

"Seventy-Six Condos"
Lee Walton

Seventy-six condos planned for Anson Field,
With a hundred 'n ten town homes just behind.
And as every builder knows, there'll be
Rows 'n rows 'n rows,
Of the most expensive housing of its kind.

Seventy-Six Condos for every quid pro quo,
With deals and glowing kudos for all who sign.
There'll be Knott 'n Ginn 'n Way,
Just in time to save the day,
As they all watch jealous Wally loose his mind.

There'll be Laurens II built upon some old lagoons,
Settling, settling as it sinks away.
Double deals, term conceals and big tycoons,
Overreaches, under-funds, all end in disarray.

There'll be fifty motorcycles on the Battery,
Thundering, thundering through tourist by the score.
"Come Heres" in every guise,
And "Yankees" who've won their prize
With Yuppie wealth and bad ideas galore!

No one to nix the condos built on Ripley Point,
While a hundred 'n ten nail guns have their say.
To the tune of "Gentrify"!
All poor kids begin to cry,
As their parents lose their jobs and move away!

Seventy-Six Condos led the big charade,
With "Hairy Tim" following orders loud and clear.
Starting with a sleazy song to cover up his wrong,
And backed by Clemson students at the rear.

Two times six Jawbones sit and disappoint,
While a dozen new hotels will block the air.
As we watch a priceless place end up as such a waste,
Soon there'll be no sun to shine on Marion Square.

Literary apologies to Meredith Willson

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